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Ask me for a photo horny4ever4it 43 M 4  Articles	Divorced Barbie   10/25/2007 One day a father gets out of work and on his way home he remembers that it's his 's birthday. He pulls over to a toy store and asks the salesperson, "How much is the Barbie on the display window?" The salesperson answers, "Which one? We have: Work out Barbie for $19.95 Shopping Barbie for $19.95 Beach Barbie for $19.95 Disco Barbie for $19.95 Divorced Barbie for $265.95 ... 3 Comments, 133 Views, 7 Votes ,4.06 Score
rm_amos1947 77 M 0  Articles	My Fifth Grade School Teacher   10/9/2007 I remember the prettiest girl in the class, Carol absent mindedly witing in ink on Miss Beyers new leather elk hide jacket and poor Emma Jane Pree getting the blame for it. Shame shame shame Carol. A secret all these years and it finally comes out fifty years later by an eye witness. First time I told this too and more.............First time I heard about saddle soap and Judith Beyers openly ... 2 Comments, 47 Views, 1 Votes ,5.00 Score
lovetolick61989 20 M 2  Articles	Why me?   10/1/2007 Why do i always get into fucked up relationships 5 Comments, 88 Views, 3 Votes ,1.96 Score
Ask me for a photo meatofmanhood 51 M 9  Articles	All to be young again !!!!   9/30/2007 Two 90 year olds had been dating for a whie, when the man told the woman, "well tonight we will have sex" And so they did As they lying in bed afterward the man thinks to himself "My god if I knew she was a virgin I would have been more gentle with her " And the woman was thinking to her self my god if I knew the old geezer could actually get it up, I would have taken off my pantie hoses off 2 Comments, 167 Views, 6 Votes ,4.79 Score
Ask me for a photo meatofmanhood 51 M 9  Articles	smelly !!!!   9/30/2007 A guy walks into an elevator and stands next to a beautiful woman. after a few minutes he turns to her and says " can I smell your pussy? " The woman looks at him in disgust and says, " Certainly not! " "Hmmm" he replies. It must be your feet then. 4 Comments, 244 Views, 8 Votes ,3.94 Score
Ask me for a photo meatofmanhood 51 M 9  Articles	dead beaver   9/29/2007 a guy was at the bar showing all his buddys that he could tell them what animal they had and how they killed it blind folded ..after all night of drinking he walked home. The next day he woke up and found out he had a black eye ..he asked his wife what happen she said you bastard you came home put you finger in my pussy and said beaver.. killed with an axe 2 Comments, 162 Views, 6 Votes ,3.93 Score
rm_amos1947 77 M 0  Articles	My Fifth Grade School Teacher   9/28/2007 I remember the prettiest girl in the class, Carol absent mindedly writing in ink on Miss Beyers new leather elk hide jacket and poor Emma Jane Pree getting the blame for it. Shame shame shame Carol. A secret all these years and it finally comes out fifty years later by an eye witness. First time I told this too and more.............First time I heard about saddle soap and Judith Beyers openly ... 1 Comments, 190 Views, 3 Votes ,2.94 Score
Ask me for a photo rm_bigz967 64 M 4  Articles	older married couple   9/21/2007 An older married couple were always bickering. Their current argument got more and more personal with each insult. The husband finally annnounced he had had enough and was going to dump her for a 20 year old. "Go ahead, mister. I'll do the same and make out a helluva lot better than you will." "Really, " retorts the husband. "Why do you think so?" "Simple, " she said. ... 3 Comments, 166 Views, 7 Votes ,3.55 Score
_JKH_ 69 M 858  Articles	" In Laws "   9/19/2007 Me and my second wife were driving down a country road one day not saying a word after an earlier ding buster of a battle we'd had and neither of us wanted to to give it up. As we passed a barnyard of mules and pigs my wife sarcastically asked me, "Relatives of yours are they?" "That's right Miss America! They're my in-laws." 15 Comments, 323 Views, 47 Votes ,3.58 Score
Ask me for a photo horny4ever4it 43 M 4  Articles	A Christmas Divorce   9/16/2007 A man in Scottsdale calls his in New York on December 23rd and says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough." "Pop, what are you talking about?" the screams. "We can't stand the sight of each other any longer, " the father says. "We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you ... 2 Comments, 149 Views, 10 Votes ,5.18 Score
happycouple973 49 C 95  Articles	I had that chance. Her name was Rachel.   9/4/2007 She lay back on her bed. Rachel's sexiness was all engrossing. Her olive skin covered her limbs like the yellows, greens and tans of Van Gough Dandelion ‒ symbiotic in his shades. <br> Rachel was truly the sexiest woman that men had ever seen. She was a striking ‒ the kind one writes ballots about. <br> I was touched by her essence, which shone brilliantly ... 3 Comments, 324 Views, 18 Votes ,2.17 Score
_JKH_ 69 M 858  Articles	Dear Abbey   8/25/2007 Dear Abby, My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the beginning, and, when I confront him, he denies everything. What's worse is that everyone knows that he cheats on me. It is so humiliating. Also, since he lost his job six years ago; he hasn't even looked for a new one. All he does all day is smoke cigars, cruise around and bullshit with his buddies while I have to ... 15 Comments, 386 Views, 56 Votes ,3.10 Score
_JKH_ 69 M 858  Articles	" Sweet Thang"   8/24/2007 A young girl of 13 was hearing a lot of new words pertaining to sex at school that she didn't understand at all. She decided to ask her divorced, single beautiful 30 year old blonde headed mom about it bluntly. The told her mom the at school were saying things about going down on one another and that she didn't understand it at all. She asked her mom, "Will you tell me what they mean?" ... 8 Comments, 416 Views, 53 Votes ,2.71 Score
Ask me for a photo spontaneous1951 71 C 1  Article	The Post(Mail)man retires !   7/27/2007 The local postman is retiring after many years of loyal service to the neighbourhood and is calling on his " customers" to say goodbye, he knocks at the door and the Lady of the House opens the door she says she is expecting him and wants to thank him for many years loyal service and that she has a large cooked breakfast waiting for him, he eats the tasty meal and just before he finishes she ... 5 Comments, 308 Views, 19 Votes ,4.71 Score
PassionatePoly 66 F 20  Articles	Family Vibrator   7/15/2007 The Family Vibrator A 60 year old woman came home one day and heard strange noises in her bedroom. She opened the door and discovered her 40 year old playing with her vibrator. "What are you doing?", asked the mom. "Mom, I am 40 years old and look at me. I am ugly. I will never get married so this is pretty much my husband." The mother walked out of the room, shaking her head. ... 10 Comments, 484 Views, 34 Votes ,6.83 Score
rm_XMISTERYMANX 58 M 47  Articles	Sex of Ages   7/10/2007 A note to the elderly. Sex is GOOD for You, Good for you , if you can find someone your age to have it with. A note to the young, it really is love, the first of many. We never learned from being teens, it's real love, and it does break-up, so I say watch the married thing. A note to the mid aged, just have lotsa fun. A note to the semi-senior aged, do what you can ... 1 Comments, 83 Views, 4 Votes ,3.25 Score
rm_XMISTERYMANX 58 M 47  Articles	Some Sex Oddities   7/7/2007 So can't afford one of those fancy chairs you hang on the ceiling and she sits above you and you stick your dick through the hole and into her while she spins. So, you decide to improvise. That old wicker basket chair will do. So u cut the hole, hang it up and she gets in, you get in her and she starts to spin, well, I did say "wicker". It cuts the hell out of your dick, the commotion breaks ... 3 Comments, 126 Views, 6 Votes ,3.08 Score
rm_liz3120072 48 F 6  Articles	He suffers from premature ejaculation!   7/7/2007 A man was having problems with premature ejaculation. This was affecting marital relations with his wife so he decided to go to the doctor. He asked the doctor what could he do to cure his problem. In response the doctor said, "When you feel the urge to ejaculate, try star-tling yourself". One the way home the man went to a sports store and bought himself a starter pistol. All ... 10 Comments, 675 Views, 41 Votes ,8.57 Score
rm_setinhere 55 M 1  Article	Comebacks to Pickup Lines   7/6/2007 Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore. Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down. Man: Your place or mine? Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine. Man: So, what do you do for a living? Woman: I'm a female impersonator. Man: Hey baby, what's your sign? Woman: Do not ... 4 Comments, 94 Views, 9 Votes ,4.49 Score
rm_XMISTERYMANX 58 M 47  Articles	Watching the Wife!   7/5/2007 Why do so many guys like to see their wives fucked? Well they would love 3 way with 2 women, but 2 guys and a girl...NOPE! I can tell you why...We are afraid of getting touched, coming into contact with another hard on. Can't help being just hereto. Just think, you all are at it and you are down on her and your ass is in the air, WELL, You feel a cock against your asshole, WoaH doggie. There ... 1 Comments, 115 Views, 3 Votes ,2.94 Score
rm_XMISTERYMANX 58 M 47  Articles	Women's Date Disasters   6/30/2007 Now Time for the Girls Date disasters. He farts! He Fuckin stinks! His underwear has racing stripes! He Loves Garlic! He shows up in a Hyundai Pony! He forgets his wallet! He wears a polyester suit! His cock is too small! His cock is too big! (I know, no such thing) He has a dump and doesn't flush! ... 1 Comments, 55 Views, 6 Votes ,3.65 Score
rm_XMISTERYMANX 58 M 47  Articles	It Happens!   6/25/2007 Things Can Happen! Things like this: She smells sweet, nice perfume. That's up there, down there it's like a fish market. You, with many oral talents, almost have her there, then she rips a gassy, smelly FART! You are in the most passionate of sex and you have cramps, then the trots! The starts to lick your asshole and nuts! I saw it, don't want to ... 3 Comments, 110 Views, 2 Votes ,2.42 Score
rm_XMISTERYMANX 58 M 47  Articles	Do I Cum or Move the Dog   6/24/2007 Oh My, ..First date, well first time we jump in the sack and we were doing just great. Till the "dog". He burst through the door and and hopped the bed with ease and made a b-line for my asshole and her pussy. With a tongue that makes me envious he covers our nether parts with long lashes of the famous tongue.Well so much for the first time. Since then there have been lotsa times. The always ... 3 Comments, 229 Views, 9 Votes ,3.43 Score
rm_Choodhna 54 C 21  Articles	Adult Gamer Part one   6/12/2007 Game Adults Play Part one When three four couples get together at someone's place to have some fun in the weekends, routine sex and swapping becomes somewhat monotonous. You become used to the body and a sexual preference of other person's wife or husband and just having sex with someone other's wife or husband looses its charm. So introducing some novelty is must. Therefore you can ... 3 Comments, 170 Views, 9 Votes ,5.56 Score
bongo2577 46 M 3  Articles	The rules from the male side   6/10/2007 We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE! 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 1. ... 3 Comments, 216 Views, 19 Votes ,6.55 Score
gattomonstrosis 55 M 2  Articles	English Translations   6/7/2007 Women's English: ----------------- 1 Yes = No 2 No = Yes 3 Maybe = No 4 I'm sorry = You'll be sorry 5 We need = I want 6 It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now 7 Do what you want = You'll pay for this later 8 We need to talk = I need to complain 9 Sure go ahead = I don't want you to 10 I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron! 11 You're so manly ... 2 Comments, 88 Views, 10 Votes ,4.58 Score
rm_liz3120072 48 F 6  Articles	Words of wisdom on the concept of marriage!   6/2/2007 You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead. ********** At a cocktail party, one women said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" "Yes, I am. I married the wrong man." ********** A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds: "Husband Wanted" Next day she received a hundred letter's. They all said the same ... 4 Comments, 212 Views, 16 Votes ,4.01 Score
Swankie57 65 M 50  Articles	Pre Relationship Agreement!   4/12/2007 P R E - R E L A T I O N S H I P A G R E E M E N T On this _____day of ______, 2007, the party of the first part___________________________ (herein referred to as "She"), being of sound mind and pretty good body, agrees to the following with the party of the second part _________________________(herein referred to as "He"): I. 1. FULL DISCLOSURE 1.1 At the commencement of said relationship ... 5 Comments, 255 Views, 10 Votes ,3.19 Score
nightimesmile 43 M 1  Article	finding friends on AdultFriendFinder   4/3/2007 i don't know if it's just me but i always thought it weird to see friends on sites like AdultFriendFinder...but the other day i skimmed across a picture that was really familiar and lo and behold it was a friend of mine trying to have some fun on the web... i messaged her and she was appalled that i found her on here. after talking on the phone we agreed to get together and ... 1 Comments, 173 Views, 7 Votes ,2.02 Score
rm_u4617031 39 M 1  Article	Meet You in Heaven   3/14/2007 After a long illness, a woman died and arrived at the Gates of Heaven. While she was waiting for Saint Peter to greet her, she peeked through the Gates. She saw a beautiful banquet table. Sitting all around were her parents and all the other people she had loved and who had died before her. They saw her and began calling greetings to her -- "Hello" "How are you! We've been waiting for you!" "Good ... 2 Comments, 208 Views, 9 Votes ,5.99 Score